What do barristers talk about?

Why, judges of course. Put two barristers in a room together and what they will agree on, (privately of course, for the hearing of no-one but each other), is how appalling Mr Justice Periwinkle in Dimcaster County Court is. Honestly, you'd think they'd have got rid of the old goat years ago. Wrong on the law, wrong on the facts - the man's a menace. Unless he finds in your favour, of course. In which case, it would be hard to find a greater champion of English liberty or a wiser fountain of learned jurisprudence.